Monday, June 2, 2008

Ahem! Free Foods are Free.


Why yes Brownie, I still find it offensive that they call themselves free when they are surely quite the opposite. I believe that's called false advertising. I shall take this up with Lawman and the court system. I'm after you Free Foods. Mwahahahahahaha!!!!


Free cake and brownies and a chance to meet my secret love, the Pillsbury Doughboy!!! THAT'S free food with an added bonus. Last week, Pillsbury basically put the Doughboy on my doorstep for the taking and I wanted to take, take it all. I took more than my fair share of free brownies, paper chef hats, pens that say Pillsbury, and buttons (you never know when you or one of your friends may need flair,) but, as Brownie can tell you, there was not a Pillsbury Doughboy in sight, well except for the blow-up one on the top of the truck. I inquired as to the Doughboy's whereabouts.
"It's hot out and he had to take a break," said a Pillsburyian.
"But, um, he only has to be here for 4, maybe 5 hours. You're kidding me right?" says the wounded blonde one.
"No."
"Piece of shit."
I will never meet my true love now.


Now what Pret a Manger gave me last week, THAT was ÜBER-free food. I, being the loyal, any moment I have free time, Midtown Lunch reader/peanut gallery member that I am, was happy when the fabulous, the wonderful Zach Brooks did this post. Why, that's right down the street from me. By the time I stopped by, all they had left was egg-salad sandwich, which is not something I eat, but there were extra goodies for me to munch on. and they were free!! Which only makes them taste better!!! I sat with Patience and Fortitude and ate my lunch, wondering what free food tasting will arrive next. I'm still pondering that.

1 comment:

danny said...

man, no fair! my version of free food was crap! grrrr